This was sent in by one of my readers and I have her permission to share as long as I kept their real names out of it, so here it is:
“Who is picking aunty up from the airport?” I asked, briefly taking my eyes off the movie I was watching, I knew I could not drive as a result of a sprain I had, but despite my aunt’s meddlesome nature,I also knew we could not just leave her at the airport, tempting as the idea seemed.
“Jay, she already called to say she was at the airport” I spoke specifically to the older of my brothers “knowing aunty and all her drama, this won’t be put to rest if she gets here in a cab o”
Jay stood up lazily and walked to the fridge to pour himself a glass of water, muttering something about all Nigerian airlines having delays and they would figure out who would go.
“Don’t look at me, I am not driving all the way to the airport only to have her complain that I am not respectful enough or ass kissing enough for her” retorted Ose, who was the youngest and a bit of a rebel, so it was no surprise that he always ended up having one fight or the other with Aunty.Aunty X was not really our aunty, but our mum’s childhood friend who always seemed to be on our case as she had no children of her own, I guess she meant well most times though.
Just as we were still debating her pickup, she called :
“who is picking me up from the airport o, I don’t want to stay there and wait like the time we came from London. Ose came late and we had to take a cab which led to our being robbed on the third mainland” all in one breath she continued “Dana has just announced boarding, so someone should be at the airport!”
As soon as I got off the phone, I said “ Jay and Ose, Aunty X is on Dana, road trip guys, lets all head for the airport”
“trust her to take the one airline that keeps to time in the country, why couldn’t she have boarded Aero or Airnigeria?”We all laughed at this, because it seemed ridiculous to blame her for flying an airline that sticks to its schedule. We headed for the car, Jay driving and Ose calling shotgun which I totally ignored and joined Jay in front, as we left Lekki for the MMA2.
We arrived at the airport and waited quite a bit, waited to see aunty X walk out of the arrival hall to complain about the flight, Ose’s hair (she hated his Mohawk) and probably Jay’s driving. But she never did, Aunty X never got off that plane and as we eventually managed to drive home after visiting the crash site, all we wanted was to hear her complain and whine…but I guess we never will.Adieu aunty X, we loved you despite the madness we seemed to bring to you, and we pray you find rest.