"Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet (or any flower) sheds on the heels of those who crush it"- Anonymous
I think most of us are guilty of not walking our talk, in other words our actions and are words are a far cry from each other. I recently had a talk with a friend, who kept saying she was never going to forgive a colleague for some work related issue, she went on and on, and was apparently very pained by the whole incident. I did not want to sound all self righteous by saying "you have to learn to let it go and forgive the person", I wanted her to really let off steam before telling her what I thought.
The short version of the grievance was that her colleague was some guy who was fond of stealing people’s ideas and passing them off as his own (we all have them in our offices I guess), but this time he had made a sly move that might rob her of her long awaited promotion, so she was furious!
I listened, was very empathetic, then I finally spoke (I sound all wise, don’t I? Lol). I explained what I felt about forgiveness, and that is what I am sharing on this piece, just my thought and what motivates me to forgive.
I have never really felt that the act of forgiveness was meant to help only the forgiven, I have always understood it be more in favour of the forgiver. Being forgiving for me gives a sense of peace, it helps you deal with the situation better without the mind clutter that comes with bearing a grudge. I am not saying it is an easy feat, it is hard to do when you have been hurt deeply in anyway, but letting go is totally worth it.
Not to be all pious here, I am yet to see the great deed hatred, unforgiveness or vengeance has ever fostered. Yes, it might give some people that sense of satisfaction, which makes you just as bad as the person you are taking out the rage on, but at the end of the day it fosters more grudge and no one benefits (unless the satisfaction of being sadistic counts!)
The first time I heard the biblical quote “do not let the sun go down on your wrath” it caught my attention and I could relate with it, because if you make a conscious effort to let go of every grudge before sunset, then there will never be an accumulation of beef or bad belle flying all over the place.
And isn’t it ironic how we want to be forgiven when we do wrong, but chose not to forgive when the shoe is on the other foot? C’mon guys, it’s a two way street. And going by the Lord’s prayer, you have to forgive in order to be forgiven.
I have learnt about the joy and the power of forgiveness in big and small things, I have experienced the peace that comes with forgiving, I have also experienced the relief of being forgiven and like I always say, treat people with the curtsy of Christ. I am no preacher, but I love being a Christian, and the last time I checked forgiveness was not given to us as an option.
“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us”